It's a BOY! - I wrote this on November 21st and never published It

20 weeks pregnant!!

Baby is the size of a banana....Awkward fruit comparison, but apparently it is the length of a banana.

We went to the doctor yesterday for our 20-week check up. We had our ultrasound first to check on the baby and determine the sex. The ultrasound was so fun! I just loved getting to hang out with our little boy for 30 mins or so watching him move, stretch and rest. He is such a cutie! I love him already.

Immediately after we left my appointment we went to our baker who had agreed to make a delicious gluten-free gender reveal cake for us. Big big shout out to BabyCakes Cupakes - We love them so much! They made our wedding cupcakes, our anniversary cake and now this. Also, we get cupcakes from them all the time. So we dropped off the envelope containing the picture of our baby's "parts" and left Trisha to work on the cake.

That night our families came together and Eric and I cut into the cake together, just like we had on our wedding day. :-) And it was a boy! I was slightly shocked at first. I had sort of thought it was a boy, but I was still just surprised that I was going to have a son!

Today at work I immediately got side-tracked and started planning the nursery for our boy. I was looking on pinterest for nursery ideas! Even though I thought it was a boy, I had always looked at girl nursery ideas, so I had no idea where to start. It's been fun getting to design our baby's room and actually think about buying him clothes! I told Eric I need to go by our boy some clothes!

Boy or girl, we are just thrilled that our little one is healthy! Everything looked great on the ultrasound.

Some cool highlights from the ultrasound were when Baby Boy Rice stretched his leg out and it went all the way across my belly! Also, our little bean smacked himself in the face at least once and we saw his little mouth moving. I cannot wait to hold my sweet baby boy!!

My nausea has mostly gone, however it lingers and shows up from time to time. I've always got zofran in the purse just in case! I made sure to stock up on zofran for our upcoming cruise. I just don't know how my pregnant body will handle the motion, but I've never gotten sick due to motion before....We shall see....

A new symptom I'm experiencing is extreme sciatic nerve pain on my left side only. I guess it's not really new, I've been having the pain for months. The new part is that it has gotten really bad and constant. I am scared to see what the next 20-weeks are like if I already have a hard time being on my feet for more than 15 minutes! Eric pointed out last night that this cruise could be interesting if it hurts for me to walk for more than 15-20 minutes. Yikes! I am seriously nervous about it. I stretch my back out and take hot baths. But really the best cure is just not being on my feet at all. If I sit, I'm fine. So, we will see how this back pain situation goes during our trip and over the next few months. Either way, I am happy to endure the pain for my little munchin.

Tomorrow we celebrate Thanksgiving. There are countless things for me to be thankful for. But today I will focus on my sweet baby boy that is growing (and kicking!) inside me. I am so thankful that the Lord has blessed us with this precious gift. I pray that I will be a good mother to my son. I pray that Eric and I will continue to grow in our marriage as we become parents together.

We leave for our totally awesome Baby-Moon on Friday! Terrified of flying - but so excited to be "unplugged" for a whole week and spending quality time with my hubby! We are so thankful for the means to go on such an amazing trip.

That's all for now.....

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL!

Body Image Issues

November 6, 2012 - 18 weeks Pregnant

 

Well I just had a big "ah-ha" moment and decided to start a blog. Yes, I am becoming one of those women who starts a blog when they are pregnant. It's a cool way to journal about everything that is changing and happening and just get my thoughts out there.

Anyway, this post is about Body Issues.

I have struggled with "body issues" my whole life. I've always had an unhealthy view of myself and thought I was bigger than I really am. I will look back and pictures and think, "Gosh I was tiny! I can't believe I thought I was fat!" But it has been like that my whole life. I remember feeling fat when I was 7 years old in dance class....

About 3 years ago I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease. In the months that followed I was very sick trying to heal my intestines and therefore could not eat very much. I lost about 20 lbs in a few short months. I even had to exchange my wedding dress for one 2 sizes smaller! I felt amazing, but still wanted to lose some more or "tone" what I had.

Looking back at my wedding photos I can see that I definitely should never be smaller than I was at that time!

After losing all that weight and feeling great about myself for the first time in my life, my attitude suddenly shifted from "I need to lose weight" to "Oh my gosh, I cannot gain back that weight." So my obsession with weight continued.

I've put on a few lbs, but nothing to be concerned about. However, it was the only thought on my mind pretty much all the time.

About 4 1/2 months ago I found out I was pregnant. We were thrilled! Before I was pregnant I thought that being pregnant would help me with my body issues. I figured, "I won't worry about my weight as much because it's okay to gain weight while you're pregnant."

Boy was I wrong!

My weight issue has only gotten worse throughout this pregnancy. I have gained more than the "recommended amount" already and I tend to track my weight all the time. Worrying that I am gaining "fat" and not just baby weight. It's been a huge issue. My dear husband has definitely heard enough of "I feel so fat" to fill a lifetime!

Today I was reading an article in Fit Pregnancy magazine about eating disorders and pregnancy. Let me be clear, I have never had an eating disorder. I just have a terrible view of myself and constantly worry about weight.

So in this article I read a quote that will hopefully change my opinion about my body obsession forever.....

The quote:

"I never want my daughter to see me stepping on the scale bemoaning my appearance or telling my husband, 'I look fat today'"

I read that and immediately started crying.

We don't know if we're having a boy or girl yet, but still that quote struck me to the core. I NEVER want my daughter or son to see me putting my appearance down or obsessing over my weight. I want them to understand that they are beautiful no matter their size! I want my child to see a mommy that is confident in who she is and knows that she was created in the image of God.

Now, I still feel that there is a need to be healthy and take care of the bodies God gave us. We need to make healthy eating choices and exercise our bodies and minds daily. But the point needs to be to take care of our bodies and be healthy, not to stay a size 4.

So the journey to deal with the issue has only just begun, but I pray this quote and realization will make a lasting impact on me and the life of my unborn child.